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Ask The Plant

What is a gender and where do I get one?

-Bones


I’m going to be honest with you, Bones (Bonesy? Bonathan?), I picked mine up at a garage sale when I was 12, it was like $2 and my mom said I could get whatever I wanted. It doesn’t always work and sometimes it makes this weird beeping noise that I can’t turn off. Most of the time it just sits on the stack of books by my desk, but at this point I’m kinda attached to it and I don’t really wanna throw it out. I feel like the space would be too empty. Maybe I could put a plant there instead.

I’m definitely not the best person to ask about gender. I mean I can tell you what I did for mine, but I think I missed the day where they were explaining what it was so I tried looking it up but all the websites were subscription based and I didn’t feel like turning my ad-blocker off to access them. Nobody answered my emails about it either.

From what I understand, it’s one of those collectible sets with a bunch of different colours but you can never collect the whole set because the company only sends one colour per shipment so even if you buy like 10 at once from the store they’ll all be the same. Not sure if it’s the same for all the brands though, might depend where you get it from.

You can probably find them anywhere they sell soap. Same section, bottom shelf. Walmart, Canadian Tire, maybe even the Dep might have? I’m pretty sure I saw some at Dollarama once. It was in the aisle next to the candy, but it’s the dollar store so just be aware of the quality, you probably get what you pay for. I have a friend in one of the arts programs who got his from the Dawson Bookstore downstairs to test it out. Apparently it’s not that great, they tried returning it but it was non-refundable. She said she’d wait for it to break before getting a new one just so it wasn’t a complete waste. Reduce, reuse, recycle, save the planet, all that stuff.

Personally, I recommend going to the thrift store to buy a gender. It’s more sustainable, there’s always a bunch of different styles, and if you look long enough you can usually find some gems! I went to the Value Village near my house the other day and I found this really pretty one, it didn’t fit me though but I ended up getting it for my friend anyway. I’m giving it to her tomorrow, I’m really hoping she likes it because I think it would really suit her.

If you don’t feel like paying for it just steal it; nobody’s gonna know. Who’s gonna know? Nobody’s gonna know. They don’t pay anyone enough to keep track of them. Or wait for after Christmas or Valentine’s Days, that’s when things usually go on sale.

Whatever you end up getting, just make sure it fits comfortably and you can move around in it. Doesn’t really matter what anyone else thinks, even if someone says it’s “whacky” or “eccentric” (thanks mom), someone else will appreciate it just as much as you. Also if you change your mind you can always get another one later! It really doesn’t matter, as long as you’re happy with it.

Gender, I want to say, is like a bottle of wine. I personally don’t know anything about wine, so I usually just get the one with the prettiest label. Bonus points if it’s a sparkling red, I like those a lot.

In the meantime, Bonesy, I’ll let you know if I see any for sale on Depop.


Best of luck my dear Bones,

xoxo,

Pipa

Editor-in-Chief



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