Ask The Plant
By Miriam Sossin
Dear Plant,
How do you face career uncertainty?
Ah, the ultimate question of the second year CEGEP student aching to get out into the real world while having no idea what they want to do in it. My answer is, to not. Don’t face it! To stress about the future, to spend so much of the present worried that your decisions will lead to you working in a dead-end depressing job until a robot takes it, is frankly a waste of time. And your time is valuable! I don’t think the issue of your future should be ignored completely, but it’s not something you can control, so don’t try to. Uncertainty is both the blessing and the curse of youth. I think that life is so terrifying and fun because who knows what’ll happen next!
Love,
The Plant
My girlfriend has feelings for another guy. What should I do?
First make sure your sources are reliable. How do you know? If it’s because she liked that hot person’s photo on instagram, calm down. If it’s because she told you so directly, here’s what I would advise: It’s possible that your girlfriend is seeking another man because you’re not fulfilling a part of the relationship, and this might be something fix-able! That being said, she might be catching feels for someone else simply because of the people you two are. I’m all for romantic gestures and if it’ll help give you closure, fight for her, but I’m inclined to believe that she is also an independent person, and if you lose this fight, you ought to valiantly accept the defeat. The key is communication. Since, sadly, I can’t actually tell you what’s going on in her head, I would advise talking to your girlfriend. If things don’t work out, there are some great heartbreak songs that I could recommend.
Best of luck,
The Plant
Fart?
This was asked twice by the same person, leading me to believe that it was truly an urgent inquiry. “Fart” is a loaded question, and I’ll attempt to capture it’s nuance and complexity in this answer. We so often try to push away the perceivably ‘gross’ parts of life. While I don’t think farting is something that should be advertised or encouraged in public settings, it is a part of what makes us human. Like the eye-opening children's book elegantly titled, “Everybody Poops”, I respond to this question that, yes, everybody farts. It is not something to be ashamed or proud of, but simply something that we must accept. I understand that this acceptance can be difficult. What if someone disrupts you with a fart, or farts when you’re sitting close to them? These are troubling situations no one would want to experience, and my prayers are with those who currently are trying to cope. But at the end of the day, life is about our imperfections. I thank the brave asker of this question and finish with this: If you judge someone for a fart, can you really say that you have a heart?
Love,
The Plant
Is it important to be happy?
I love this question. Happiness is often seen as an end-goal of life, the ultimate thing to be. What I’ve come to realize, in my extensive 19 years of life, is that happiness ain’t all that! For a few years, I always blew out my birthday candles and wished “To be Happy”. I realize I might be cursing myself to a life of eternal sadness for sharing this, but the nature of the wish made it an impossibility to begin with. I’m exploring the idea that being happy is a myth. This is not to say that life is a collection of miserable moments occasionally sparkled with a happiness that is taken away just as quickly as it came; I am not a pessimist. I think that we feel happy, and that that’s great. It’s important to feel happy about who you are and who you’re with and what you’re doing. But to strive for an overall state of perfect happiness is too much pressure to put on yourself.
My dad often says that “hope is the first step on the path to despair”, and I’ve always found this a hilariously depressing way of thinking. But, it’s true! Our perception of everything is based on our expectations for it. If being happy is the most important thing to you, and you’ve hyped up happiness as much as you’ve hyped up your favourite TV show that none of your friends will watch, you’ll never really feel happy, and your friends will never love the show as much as you do; you’re screwed!
Happiness is whatever happiness is to you, and I think that finding happiness in little things is important. There are so many terrible things happening all of the time in all of the places, that seeking happiness is something that we should all do for the sake of our sanity. We should avoid thinking that the point of living is to reach a mystical state of eternal happiness, and instead appreciate happiness in all of its fleeting glory. So yes, I would say it is important to be happy, but don’t be upset if you’re not happy all the time!
Have a happy Thursday!
The Plant